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Do you ever wonder why you gravitate toward a friend who has consistently hurt you, yet you keep going back for more?

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Ideally, you should spend your time with people who care about you and encourage you, Hurtlng those who put you down and cause problems in your life. Sometimes a friendship will be so Hurting and need a friend to leave that you'll be putting up with your friend's bad behavior for years.

What to Do When Your Friend Hurts Your Feelings | Teen Vogue

Why do you do this? And more importantly, how do you stop it? Here are some thoughts. Chances are that sometimes you'll have a good time with your toxic friend.

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You'll enjoy his or her company, so when they have a major blow up or put you down suddenly, you shake it off thinking that next time will be different. The problem with toxic friends is that you are unable to communicate reasonably with them.

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Whereas you'd probably tell a friend, "Hey, that hurt my feelings" and they would apologize and you'd both move on, you can't do that in a toxic friendship because your friend just won't hear it. Maybe they're a bullymaybe they can't listen to Hurting and need a friend, or maybe they are just unable rriend have a conversation that isn't about them.

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Your assumption might be that even if you don't discuss the situation, your toxic friend will feel sorry for acting badly and want to do better. But this thinking is flawed because it's based on what you would do.

You can't change the behavior of others. If you've ever thought to yourself, "They couldn't really mean that, could they?

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You are giving them a pass based on who you want them to be instead neer who they really are. Accept the things they do Hurting and need a friend face value, especially when you've given them the benefit of the doubt many, many times.

Start looking at them realistically so you can protect yourself.

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Perhaps your own personal background edges you toward acceptance of bad behavior. Maybe you even think this is what friendship is all about.

But there is a big difference between someone that is just having a Hurting and need a friend day and someone who consistently does negative frienc. The difference is that a friend will feel bad that they hurt you and offer an apology.

They'll mess up from time to time, but their intention is not to hurt.

If you find that you're consistently allowing toxic behavior into your friendships, or even that all your friends seem to be of this negative nature, seek out a professional who can talk to you about dealing with the perceptions you carry from your past. An you see yourself as a kind of friendship warrior.

How to Deal With Friends That Hurt You: 13 Steps (with Pictures)

You believe you're there to make all friendships great. It's a noble goal, but the only problem is that you can't change people, they have to do it themselves.

Allowing their negative behavior to continue only makes them believe it's okay to treat you that way. They feiend get the wake up to be a better friend until you are honest with them.

Tell them as kindly as you can that you won't tolerate bad treatment and if they continue behaving poorly and give them examples so they Hurting and need a friend what you're talking aboutthen you're done.

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However, toxic people are notoriously bad at listening and it's hard to have a genuine conversation about their behavior.

They don't want to hear itand until they're ready to listen, you can't help. Move on to Hurting and need a friend volunteer activity or person who will accept your help.

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Sometimes you have a friemd time making friends, so you hang on to the toxic ones because you think it's better than being alone. While it's hard to be lonely, filling up your life with toxic people doesn't make you feel less lonely.

That's because loneliness can only be remedied by deep, meaningful connections with friends.

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When you have a friend that understands you even just one you'll feel less lonely and will value good friendships that much more. If you're lonely, focus on just meeting more people here Hurting and need a friend some tips for how to do that and make an effort to form a new friendship with the people you have fun with, who treat you well, and who encourage you rather than tear you down.

Updated November 06, Continue Reading. LiveAbout uses cookies to provide you with a great user experience. By using LiveAbout, you accept our.